I feel compelled to remark on the linked letter I found in the Slate advice columns.

The run down is six years ago she wanted to bring her new born baby home and she only wanted family to greet her. This means her husband had to 86 the nanny who was taken care of her older daughter. When she arrives home her nanny is leaving in tears because she thinks the woman doesn’t want her to met the new baby. So instead of enjoying the baby, she had to comfort the nanny. Six years later she is still mad about the nanny ruining her special day.

Really? I mean REALLY. This is a problem.

First, the nanny was already at her home, taking care of her other kid. Her husband had to ask the nanny to leave so only family would be there when she arrived. Now, I grant the husband may have botched asking the nanny to leave but she put the husband in a difficult position in the first place — a family only guest list which could have been ruined in any number of ways. A neighbor could have come by with food at the same time or been working in the yard as she drove up. Those are two off the cuff examples. Given some more time, I am sure I can think of some more. The point here is there is no way to control other people even on your special day. One of life’s little lessons is to learn how to roll with the punches.

Second, the nanny was at your house already. She had to be asked to leave. It’s awkward. If I were the nanny, I might feel a little insulted at the request. Does it really ruin your special day if the nanny hung around to met the new baby that she will soon be caring for. The nanny could have had quick cootchy cootch coo and left. But no, the nanny had to be gone are it would ruin your special day. Ruin it. Her special day.

Third, I have heard of wedding days being a special day for the bride and birthdays although there should be an age limit on that one. But bringing home the baby from the hospital? When did that become such a special day to the point where the mother tries to control the guest list for her arrival home. Her expectations are way too high for the occasion involved.

Finally, six fucking years ago. This happened six years ago. Give it a rest. You have two kids looking up to you to as a role model. Try not to model behavior that will make them into whinny ninnies